Women and the Big O
61Women who are lousy in the sack
Ever listen to a bunch of guys talking about their conquests? Take for an example construction workers. I consider THEM to be a pretty valid source of information regarding when the women they've slept with are regarded as lousy in the sack.
Most men I know would rather avoid going to bed with a woman who will end up making them feel they should have just masturbated. They'd rather just beat the meat. The truth seems to be, the average woman (according to those surveys :}) is not able to achieve orgasm or has never had one!
I was astounded! So I asked some friends. 3 out of 7 admitted to not being able to have the big *O* (and they've been sexually active for over 30 years). 1 admitted to never having had one with a man (she can by herself.) Imagine that! But since it's what I was told (and who is going to say that if it ain't so) - I have to assume it is true.
Now this hub may be WAY out of my league or the norm of my usual hubs, but I ran into Ms. Snow here so I thought ~ what the heck!
Ms. Snow said : "most of us own toys." So I asked about that as well. Only 3 out of those 7 women I asked admitted to it. Doesn't mean it's TRUE mind you.
SO I've put together my OWN list of why men might think you are lousy in the sack and what to do about it (assuming you care.)
Be a GREAT Faker!
Ever hear of fake it til you make it? It applies to many things and this can be one of them.
If you really *are* crappy in the bedroom (or on the kitchen counter)...you CAN still make him feel like he is the KING. "Oh Man! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh. A lot of moaning is sure to help, wiggle here, wiggle there. Act all hot (never know, you might just get *into it*). Make him feel like he is Really getting somewhere!
Be a Great Date.
If you go out or stay in; a date is a date and for most men, if you haven't had sex (or close to it) by the 3rd *date* - you probably won't be seeing him again. What, exactly, is it you are *saving yourself* for? Marriage? Maybe, but this hub is directed at mature women with experience with men.
Do Some Research.
Find out what you CAN do and do it! Read Cosmo if you need to. If you are trying to improve in this department, then, as with most things that don't *come naturally* (pun intended) to you - then get to studying!
You are What you Think you are.
Having a poor self-image hurts you. It hurts you more than most anything. It is pretty difficult to be good in bed if you are having identity issues. DO things that will make you feel better about yourself. Do things that will enhance your feminine side.
Example: If it's weight issues, learn that being over-weight does NOT make you a poor lover. It is what you are allowing your mind to tell you that is!
Anatomy of Yourself.
Check out your own anatomy and get comfortable with it. Hay, if you are not comfy with your own parts, how is he supposed to be? A woman who is not comfortable with her anatomy - well, sexuality is Never going anywhere but downhill.
Sex is Not bad, not evil, not a sin. It is a normal, healthy human function and does wonders for your mental health, physical health, relieves stress and sends out Wonderful hormones to sooth the body.
Get crackin' girls!
Sex and You
How do you rate yourself in the sack?
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A woman not reaching orgasm seldom has to do with her own bedroom skill...normally it is her partner, who thinks that "A good fucking" Will do it, when the majority of women need more than just *Pokepokepokefartrolloversnore*
For God's sake, get these guys an anatomy class! And remind them that it's OK to incorporate toys into your sex lives (Using a vibrator during foreplay does not make you a bad partner, it makes you a concientious one!)
Now, some women really are just to tense during sex and need to masturbate a couple times. Once you can do it on your own, you can do it with a partner, and if not, then tell your other half what works. Good sex involves communication!
Oh Jess, you crack me up!
Suiiki - awesome! You should of written this hub! great comments!
Personally, I think alot of women have a hard time letting go. If you haven't had the O there is a problem somewhere. Whether it is your partner, problems within yourself, or some medical dysfunction. I would seriously see a Dr. if I had this problem. Great Hub!
dori
The female orgasm is a myth perpetuated by women to control men...much like the myths of childbirth pain and PMS. As an inadequate male, I am deeply offended by this hub and intend to report you to the hubcops...who are all inadequate males as well so you're in big trouble privateye2500 ! Big Trouble!
...no pjk - you have it all backasswards.
The MALE orgasm is the great myth!
Shooting out fluids and then shriveling up to *us* does NOT even come Close!
ROTFL!!
It's about losing your identity in the arms of the beloved--becoming a new entity, in a sense. It's rare, but once experienced, all else is disappointing when compared to that exquisite feeling.
One more tip: Don't be afraid to fantasize. Orgasm has much to do with the brain and as writers we all know imagination is a very powerful thing.
Try imagining you just got picked up for a book deal because of your hubs...
That is truly beautiful Philip.
Are you REALLY a Guy? :}
I am. but these are not the kinds of thoughts I can share with my mountain biking friends..LOL.
Did you know there are actually four types of orgasms a woman can have?
1) Negative 2) Positive 3) Spiritual 4) Fake.
1)Negative: She screams “No! No! No1”
2)Positive. She screams “Yes! Yes! Yes!”
3)Spiritual: She screams “Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!”
4)Fake. She screams “Oh Peter! Oh Peter! Oh Peter!”
-Peter
--Oh PEtArr - PEtArr - PEtarrrrr...
(sighing voice of Greta Garbo, back hand over her forehead).
You know - YOU TOTALLY CRACK ME UP!!! LOL.
You really are quite clever, you ol doggy you. *ruff ruff*
Dear Philip - I am still not convinced.
...Send me a photo...? LOLLLLL!!!!! :}
heehee
I'm just not quite on the bell curve. It's kinda lonely down here off the statistical norm...LOL. Yep, that's me in the darkish pic in the profile. And every time I see your pic, that song by Hall and Oates is playing in my head. I'm not sure why, and I'm starting to find it troubling. Can you say "quirky"? I knew you could (in a Mr. Rodgers voice).
I find the 3 out of 7 thing hard to believe. I know in my immediate circle its 10 out of 10. The question of the day is how many "Os" in one... err encounter. My girlfriend holds the record with 9. The bitch.
The song by Hall and Oates is, "Private Eyes". By 'troubling', I just mean that way that songs can get lodged in one's head...LOL.
abcd - that is a good point I missed.
Just don't probably share with your partner who or what it is!
M/
Jess Killmenow 2 years ago
Oh, I'm afraid to comment now, because I rated myself a 10 (blush). Oh, well. I wanted to just flip the coin and say that I've been really amazed at the number of men who seem to have really no interest in trying to please their female partner. I have encountered some pretty inhibited women, but many men seem to lack the knowledge of how to give pleasure. I guess it really takes two - unless you do it by yourself!